I do not like this finals week! I do not like it—I'm no geek!

Finals say hello.

Ironically, this is the first adventure to be mentioned, because it's the first time this semester that I've had such a lack of time to waste.






Picture my surroundings:





Sparkling snow falling outside, a chunk of comforting fudge in my hand, Michael Buble Christmas on headphones, and a mountain of textbooks on the desk before me.

Methinks I'm in heaven, save for the textbooks.




Picture what I'm reading:





"...reviewers of thousands of studies—using a wide variety of research designs, methods, and participants—have concluded..."


Meeeeehhhhh...




Picture what I'm really thinking about:





Once there was a big, blue fish, who had the power to grant one wish.
But the fish was never caught, so the wish was never got.

Yeah, I made that up. Hey, when my brain cells are dying rapidly from test crammage overdose, that's pretty good!

Now I should make a poem about green eggs and ham!
Oh wait... that's already been done.

I do not like green eggs and ham! I do not like them... oh... wait a minute...

I'm leaning back, buried behind the black and white of a newspaper in which I can read about other people having adventures far from the safety of my overstuffed armchair. I'm comfortable. I'm in familiar territory. I'm SAFE.

Then along comes some random enthusiast in bright red and yellow, yapping about some grand new adventure, served up on a platter with bells and whistles.

AAAAH!!! This is something NEW!!! Will it bite me? Will it hurt me? Will it burn me or pinch me or make me sick? Will it take up too much of my time? Will I socially embarrass myself in the process? Will I be sorry I tried?

I'm not amused. Some little bug in the back of my brain is saying, "Try it! You may like it!", but I am irritated. I try to think how I can get out of this uncomfortable situation. I decide to go for distance.

But the adventure is going for distance, too. It goes my way, and starts shoving itself in my face again.

Shoo! I think to myself. Who invited you?

I keep trying to make myself scarce, and the adventure keeps following. The persistence continues, the action culminates, and ultimately I end up in some extreme situation where I can no longer ignore the problem. I'm driven to distraction and worn out from saying no, and I find myself capitulating.

"If you will let me be, I will try it. You will see."

I bite my tongue as soon as the words are out, but I've given my word, so I have to try. With no going back, I take a corner of the new experience and gingerly nibble on it.

Oh no.

I can't like it! That's impossible!

Great. Just great.

What now? Nothing to do but admit it.

I take a deep breath. Humble pie time.

"Say, I would try this anyplace! Thanks for shoving it in my face!"